THE THREE STOOGES MEET HERCULES (1962, U.S.)

The Three Stooges
Meet Hercules

(1962) black and white ?? minutes
Normandy Productions / Columbia Pictures Corporation
Story: Norman Maurer
Screenplay: Norman Maurer, Elwood Ullman
Music: Paul Dunlap
Cinematography: Charles Welbourne
Produced by Norman Maurer
Directed by Edward Bernds

With: Moe Howard (Moe), Larry Fine (Larry), Joe De Rita (Curley Joe), Vicki Trickett (Diane Quigley), Quinn K. Redeker (Schuyler Davis), George N. Neise (Ralph Dismal/King Odius), Samson Burke (Hercules), the McKeever Twins (Siamese Cylcops), Emil Sitka (Shepherd)

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Following their appearance in the forgettable SNOW WHITE & THE THREE STOOGES for Chadwick Productions Inc. and 20th Century Fox, the Three Stooges formed their own production company, Normandy Productions. With Moe Howard's son-in-law, Norman Maurer, serving as producer, writer and occasional director, the classic comedy team began to take control of their own creative destiny.

Maurer decided to concentrate on films that spoofed classic movie genres. The first film in this series, THE THREE STOOGES MEET HERCULES, a parody of the popular Italian spectacles, takes place in 1960's Ithaca, New York, where the boys are janitors for an obnoxious, lecherous drugstore owner, Ralph Dimsel (George Neise). Dimsel has his eyes on the store's pretty stock clerk, Diane (Vicki Trickett), but Diane's heart is reserved for a struggling scientist/inventor, Schuyler Davis (Quinn Redeker).

Schuyler is trying to create and sell a time machine, which he believes will work, but the device does little more than creating sonic disruptions in the neighborhood and wrecking Dimsel's drug store. Dimsel forces Schuyler to clean up the store. The shy inventor has no choice but to give in to the bully. Enraged by her love's inability to confront her boss, and seeing that he is wasting his time on his unsuccessful invention, Diane tells Schuyler, "Either sell your time machine in two days, or you can forget about me!"

Seeing that their pal is in trouble, the Three Stooges try to fix the time machine (with typical mishaps). It doesn't help matters much that Dimsel gets a hold of Schuyler's blueprints for the device, and tampers with them. By late afternoon, the boys have ruined the time machine, and electric sparks are flying all over the basement apartment. Some of the sparks set off a box of fireworks, which creates dangerous chaos.

Diane and Schuyler return to the apartment, only to see the machine creating havoc. Luckily, Curly Joe solves the problem by stuffing his "Calm-Down Pills"(!) into the machine's gears. Before you know it, the time machine starts working and the Stooges, Diane and Schuyler are sent on a wild ride to Ithaca, Greece in the year 900 B.C.!

There, they inadvertently aide the evil ancestor of Dimsel, King Odius (also played by Niese) to defeat good King Ullyllius in battle and the demented despot take over the throne of Ithica. While our group of time travelers are celebrating with King Odius, they discover to their horror that the rightful monarch of Ithica has made a prisoner of Odius, and he is slated to be executed the next day.

They are also shocked to learn that The Mighty Hercules (athlete-turned-actor Samson Burke) is the villain's henchman. Together the pair plan to ruin the kingdom. To try and correct the wrong, the boys head for the dungeon to help Ullylius escape. But their attempted jail break is discovered by Hercules. He chases the Stooges into the women's quarters, where they are soon captured.

Angered at helping his rival escape, Odius sends the boys and Schuyler to the slave galleys while poor Diane has become the despot's queen. The boys and their friend manage to escape the slave ship by slipping Curley Joe's pills into the drummer's water.

The trio and Schuyler free the other slaves, and they have the abusive slave master and the drummer row the ship to Ithica. But a storm sinks the ship and it's crew to the depths of Poseidon. The Boys and Schuyler land on the Isle of Rhodes where they're lead to the capitol by a ditzy shepherd (Emil Sitka).

When they learn of another ship heading for Ithica, the boys sign onto to another slave ship, run by the same abusive slave master. Our heroes work at the oars, with Schuyler's arm muscles being fully developed by his rowing. The strength of this slave soon comes to the attention of the ship's owner, the King Of Rhodes (Hal Smith, best remembered as "Otis Campbell" on "The Andy Griffith Show"), and they are brought before the king.

Larry makes a remark that Schuyler's muscles make look like Hercules. Believing that the slave is the famous strong god, his majesty asks the bogus hero to help save his realm from the Siamese Cyclops. In return, the troop will be given their freedom. They accept, and after Curly Joe injects the giant monster with his "calm-down pills", via a makeshift slingshot, the beast is conquered.

In order to build up their friend's confidence, our comedic trio lets Schuyler think that he is the one who foiled the giant. Impressed with his effort, the king gives the trooper one more task to perform. They're asked to destroy The Cretin Bull, which Schuyler does with the aide of Curley Joe's pills and his strength. Before long, the bogus Hercules is performing at many events and the group is making a fortune which they hope will earn enough funds to return to Ithica, and free Diane.

Unfortunately, their attempts at earning the monies are hampered by the Greek Mafia, "Achilles the Heel" and "Freddie the Fence", who take the boy's funds in lieu of not paying for a performance license. Seeing that they have to book their friend for more events, Schuyler does more super-strong tasks, and the boys earn back their lost wealth, until they meet with the two hoods again, who not only force the group to hand over the monies, but tell the boys and Schuyler that Diane is going to marry King Odius next week!

Seeing that action is needed, the Boys route the two hoods, and they all head for Ithica, where the evil monarch is not only planning to stop Ullylius in another battle, but has also drugged poor Diane into becoming his slave. Odius is fawning over his new bride, when his henchman, the REAL Hercules, brings in a poster from Delphi that heralds the efforts of Schuyler.

The angry strong man wants to find his imposter and kill him for making a mockery of his name. Odius wants his henchmen to remain so that they can prepare for their battle with Ullylius. At that moment, the Boys and Schuyler break into the throne room and try to force the villain to release Diane. Their efforts are thwarted when Odius dumps them into the dungeons, via a hidden trap door.

Giving his henchmen a chance to destroy his rival, Odius invites the Boys and their friend to the arena the next day, where Hercules plans to tear them apart, the evil despot feeding their remains to the lions. But Schuyler bests the super strong god in battle and gains from Hercules a promise to help Ullylius regain his throne, defeat Odius and use his powers for the benefit of mankind. He accepts, and Hercules frees the boys and creates a diversion, while Schuyler frees Diane from the royal pavilion.

The group takes control of a pie wagon and heads for the time machine, which is hidden in the hills of Ithica. Angered at being thwarted, Odius follows our heroes in a chariot which has razor-sharp daggers attached to the wheel's spokes. He tries to destroy the pie wagon by cutting it to ribbons. The Boys stop their enemy by throwing cream pies at him and sending his chariot into a swamp (a gag later used in THE OUTLAWS IS COMING!).

Stalled temporarily, the angry villain follows his prey to the time machine and grabs on as they take another trek through time. Odius can't hang on and he falls into the American West, where he is chased by a tribe of Native Americans! The time machine finally returns to 1960's Ithica, New York, where Diane and Schuyler finally get a chance to kiss, and the boys give their obnoxious boss his comeuppance!

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Aside from THE THREE STOOGES MEET HERCULES, THE THREE STOOGES IN ORBIT!, THE THREE STOOGES GO AROUND THE WORLD IN A DAZE, and THE OUTLAWS IS COMING!, the boys and Maurer planned on doing even more feature films. According to "The Three Stooges Scrapbook", by Joan Howard Maurer and the Lenburg Brothers, Maurer planned to have the boys appear in THE THREE STOOGES MEET PINOCCHIO (with Jimmy Durante playing Gepetto!), THE THREE STOOGES IN KING ARTHUR'S COURT, THE THREE STOOGES MEET ROBIN HOOD, THE THREE STOOGES MEET CAPTAIN BLIGH and THE THREE STOOGEGS MEET THE MOB. Sadly, none of these films came to pass. The Three Stooges did, however, do a lot of personal appearances to promote THE THREE STOOGES MEET HERCULES (dressed in togas, sandals and laurel wreaths!)

- Kevin S. Butler

Video/DVD availability: VHS (Columbia Home Video)